Ep. 80: The Top 5 Things Men Do Thinking It Makes Them Good Guys: Elliott Katz

A lot of men want to be good guys. But Elliott Katz, author of Being the Strong Man A Woman Wants: Timeless wisdom on being a mansays a lot of what men are doing, thinking it makes them good guys, actually makes women lose respect for them.

To help these men understand why, Elliott and Suzanne discuss the top 5 things men mistakenly do thinking it makes them good guys.


 4:00  Many good husbands don’t understand why their wives are so frustrated with them

4:40  Elliott’s own marriage, subsequent divorce and journey to learn what it means to be a man in a relationship

6:40  Young men look to their fathers for wisdom and guidance

9:00  Men need to learn how to show their share of leadership in their home

10:00  Why always leaving the making plans to her is a mistake

13:20  It’s not natural for women to be in control all the time

14:30  Why it’s a mistake not to offer to pay on the first date

20:00  Why, as a a man, saying “whatever you want; you decide” doesn’t work

22:00  What men should do when their woman shoots down all of their ideas

29:00  A lot of men think they can’t lead if their wives don’t let them

**29:50  Stand up to your wife when she treats you badly. There is no conversation about this in the culture about this since it’s unpopular and typically the focus is on women being treated badly.

32:40  Men need to let their wives know what kind of treatment they won’t accept and most men are concerned with “keeping the peace.” Women do not respect men who don’t have a backbone

35:55  Takeaways for men: Take the lead, be a man with a plan, take initiative, show leadership, cast the deciding vote, tell her behavior is unacceptable






Suzanne Venker

Suzanne is an author, a coach, and a podcast host committed to helping women let go of cultural beliefs that undermine their happiness in life and in love.